Fun Days on The School Bus

A Letter for which I Wait

Sometimes Russell and Jeffrey, like I am now plagued with imagining seeing you when you are not there, I also dream of each of you sending me a letter like the one below. Do you think this will ever happen? These are the words that I would believe in my heart would express the power of how you see me.

Dear Dad,

I'm writing to you this holiday season because I want you to know, I love you. I know we haven't really talked in a few years. And I know our relationship can be depressing.

But none of that really matters. In my heart, I know you and I are cut from the same cloth. And that's the truest thing no matter how often we talk or how challenging things can be sometimes. Thank you for seeing that I am the person in you life who gave you the pride, purpose and real love that I always saw in your eyes.

I remember how you looked at me when I was a kid. There was a moment that you looked at me, and your eyes said you're perfect, Russell. I saw that you wanted me with your whole heart. Even as a baby, I felt that deeply. Thank you for cherishing my presence. Thank you Dad for showing me that love. I know I don't always show it, but that memory is imprinted on who I am. It forever shapes how I feel loved, deep down.

I was reflecting the other day ‐ I remember when we were playing in the park. You said, "I am very proud of you." And I Shared a moment of silence and understanding! In that moment, I loved how you made me feel secure, protected and a part of you that didn't let go.

Thank you for showing me how to feel respected, important in my own ways and never judged.

Dad, this holiday season, I just want you to know I love you. And no matter the distance, no matter the words I say, no matter what, this is a love that lives in me. Thank you for bringing me into this world.

I wish you a year of the purest joy, gratitude, and love.

Xoxo, Jeffrey and Russell

Love that Only a Dad can Give!

Let Me Help You Jeffrey

January 15, 2020

A Letter that may have been lost.

Jeffrey

I know that sometimes I may not have made myself clear to you. I always assumed that you knew the great love and pride I have for you unconditionally. Yet, since you moved away, when misunderstandings occurred, and things were left unsaid, it led to needless doubts, confusion, misunderstandings, insecurities and wrongful feelings.

I don't ever want you to feel insecure and wrongful feelings and I want for you to remember the words I am telling you now because they will always be current and never changing.

You (and Russell) are the greatest thing that ever happened to me. There is nothing I would rather see than your smile and nothing I would rather hear than your laughter, which used to be frequent.

I am proud of the person you have become. And no matter what happens in your life, I have confidence that you have the ability to make the right choices.

I love you and am very proud of you.

Dad

Keep Thinking

Jeffrey and Dad Fooling Around at Train Yard

Jeff, Russell and Dad lunch at Space Center

Great Friends in Nevada